Are You Suffering From Loneliness And Depression?
Do you feel dissatisfied with yourself and your relationships? Does a dark cloud of sadness and despair seem to hang over your life? Perhaps you struggle with low self-worth and believe that you’ll never amount to anything important. As a result, maybe you have no motivation to do the things you once enjoyed.
When you’re dealing with depression, you may suffer from low energy, constant mood swings, irritability, or a lack of appetite. Perhaps you find yourself isolating, sleeping the day away, and saying no to social events with friends and family. After all, you may tell yourself, No one will ever be able to empathize with me or relate to my suffering. So why should I bother telling them about it?
In the end, this is often where depression itself comes from: loneliness. A lack of healthy attachments in your life can create a void of comfort and connection, as if you have nowhere to run to in times of need. Thankfully, depression treatment is a chance to learn what a healthy attachment looks like and lean on someone else to find healing and relief.
Most Forms Of Depression Have Their Roots In Relationship Trauma
Depression is a sign that something from our past is causing sadness in our lives today. Oftentimes, it originates from traumatic experiences like betrayal, abandonment, rejection, or abuse. We are social creatures, and that’s why most trauma happens in the context of relationships. When we don’t have healthy attachments in our lives, we lack the support necessary to keep us from struggling with depression, anxiety, and loneliness.
In today’s world, these feelings of aloneness are more prevalent than ever. COVID-19 has disrupted our social lives and forced many of us to isolate ourselves from others. And for those of us in marginalized communities, constant subjection to racism, sexism, and other forms of discrimination have eroded our sense of peace. When we don’t have supportive connections to turn to, we feel helpless in the face of all the injustice and oppression in our world.
As much as our culture values autonomy and loves to tout a “pull yourself up by the bootstraps” mentality, we are not meant to work through our issues alone. Doing so goes against our basic need for connection. We are designed to lean on others for support, but for many of us, we simply don’t have the supportive community we so direly need.
In our counseling practice, we want to help you rebuild your sense of community and belonging from the ground up. Our goal is to provide you with a healing space where you can explore your emotions, learn new coping skills, and loosen the hold that depression has on your life.
Depression Treatment Can Help You Heal From Trauma And Form Healthier Connections
When you have a healthy attachment figure in your life, their strength and resources become your own. As a therapist, we want to be that figure for you, helping you lighten the load of your depression so that you don’t have to do all the heavy lifting yourself.
During the intake process, you will fill out an adult attachment survey that asks about the healthiness of your past and present relationships. You will also take a small depression inventory to determine whether your symptoms are mild, moderate, or severe. In the end, however, the greater goal of the intake process is to get to know you and establish a supportive environment where you can share your struggles without any fear of judgment.
From there, we will explore how past attachment injuries may be contributing to your depression today. For instance, maybe you underwent a traumatic breakup or you dealt with a neglectful parent when you were younger. These traumatic experiences can subconsciously inhibit your ability to form healthy connections in your life today, creating trust issues and fear of betrayal. To help you process and resolve such trauma, we often utilize an approach called Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) therapy. This approach uses gentle, bilateral stimulation techniques—such as hand tapping and side-to-side eye movements—to help you form new, healthier associations with painful memories.
Additionally, we often draw from an approach called Emotionally-Focused Therapy (EFT). At its core, EFT seeks to help you create and maintain healthy, secure attachments with others. This is done by focusing on how you feel in your relationships rather than concentrating on the words and actions of someone else. EFT will teach you to step back from conflict and look inward at your own attachment style and how that impacts your connections with others. In this way, improving your relationships can provide you with the attachments you need to heal from depression.
We also use an approach called Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), which can help you learn coping skills for staying grounded in the present moment. Instead of labeling your experience or trying to control it, you will learn to simply let the moment be, finding peace wherever you are in life. DBT skills will help you soothe and regulate your emotions when depression overwhelms you.
No matter how bleak things look right now, you can begin the recovery process by choosing to treat yourself with kindness rather than judging the way you feel. After all, depression generally stems from factors outside of your control, but healing is within your power. In depression treatment, my goal is to help you heal from attachment injuries through a healthy, supportive connection that brings transformation to every area of your life.
You may have some questions about depression treatment…
Do we have to take medication?
If you struggle with moderate to severe clinical depression, medication can certainly provide quick relief for your symptoms. But in the long run, therapy is usually much more effective, as it can equip you with new coping skills and teach you to reframe your perspective. Medication can only regulate your mood. However, in the event that you do choose to pursue medication, we would be happy to connect you with a prescriber. In the near future, we expect to have a prescriber here by the beginning of the year.
How long will depression counseling take?
There is no magic number of sessions needed to find relief from depression. Generally speaking, therapy for mild or moderate depression may run for 12 weekly sessions, and then, if you’re stabilized and feeling better, we can switch to a bi-weekly schedule. That said, everyone heals at their own pace and in their own way. It’s important to be kind to yourself, as long-term healing does not happen overnight.
Do you accept insurance?
We generally don’t take insurance. This allows me to work outside the limits of the healthcare system and devote more time to each individual client. Not only is this beneficial for me and my clients, but it is a way to stand up for systemic change, as historically, the US healthcare system has denied care to people of color. However, for those who do want to use insurance, we have an alternative practice with providers who are training to become licensed under my supervision.
Let Me Help You Loosen The Hold That Depression Has On Your Life
If you need help on how to effectively treat depression, we would be honored to help you get to the root of your symptoms and reclaim a newfound sense of joy. To begin the healing process, you can fill out the contact form, email us at [email protected], or call 216-714-3278.